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Bulls-eye.

14 Jun

True fact: Wear a T-shirt with a sequined pocket on the left boob and said left boob will receive an inordinate amount of attention.

The other white meat.

6 Jun

Everyone at this Eater event is female. If this were a Sex and the City episode, I would meet a hot girl and be all, I couldn’t help but wonder if I should give up sausage and be a vagetarian.

The Rules.

4 Jun

Me: I’m less picky about guys than when I was 25.
Mom: Why? You should be more picky.
#mymotherrules

Jealz.

4 Jun

Aww, a girl on the F passed the time by popping her boyfriend’s zits. Young love.

Separated at birth.

1 Jun

Girl on line ahead of me at Fairway has produce and Weight Watchers stuff mixed with loads of cookies and chips. My guess: A mindblowingly awesome binge is going down tonight.

I’m coming out.

1 Jun

Temperley. Lacroix. Gaultier. #closetpurgediscoveries #toomanyclothes

Sisywhat.

1 Jun

In my Greek myth, every time I contemplate getting off OkCupid, a boy that seems potentially perfect for me will materialize. Then I’ll realize he’s not and contemplate getting off OkCupid. Forever and ever anon.