My Marie Claire piece on AOL Health.

18 May

Not sure what I did to anger certain commenters so, but I’m glad I can help them work out some aggression. What sweet-talkers! (Most actually were).

12 Responses to “My Marie Claire piece on AOL Health.”

  1. blueuaugust May 19, 2009 at 10:29 am #

    I can tell you what you did to anger that writer…….you simply existed. I’ve noticed so many people have so little going on in their own lives, not to mention so little between the ears, that the only thrill out of life they can get is to vomit their disgusting self loathing all over the internet. Ignore it and move on. Great article.

  2. Jeff May 19, 2009 at 10:34 am #

    Hi, Carla. I just read your Maire Claire piece on AOL. Loved it. Excellent writing. It reminds me of a piece published in either GQ or The New Yorker in the 1990s about first dates or blind dates. Pretty vague, I know. Can’t recall the author, but it was a very entertaining story. Anyway, just felt compelled to reach out. Nothing more. All the best.

  3. Michael May 19, 2009 at 11:40 am #

    I’m not sure how I found your article. Being a 40 year old, single, full-time dad, I’m not part of the typical Marie Clarie regular reader base! However, I found your “story” touching and mind opening. (I was a little troubled by “PBR” as your choice of beer, but hey, we all have crosses to bare!) Sorry, a little stab at humor…

    Anyway, while reading your articile, all I could think about is what I would do. Our society has put so much on “attraction” and body image, that it takes special people to rise above all that and truly focus on what’s inside. We all forget that at any given moment things may change and a challenge could become part who we are.

    You have no doubt touched many minds with your story. Hopefully, a few have opened. For that, you should be very proud… I’m sure it is unintentional, but, I’m willing to bet offers for “first dates” will be rollin in! Get the date book ready…

    Michael
    Allentown, PA

  4. Johnny Cupcake May 19, 2009 at 11:54 am #

    Hi. I loved your article. I have a non-contagious skin condition. Sure, I can get away with it all day as long as I don’t take my shirt off. Ugh, I miss swimming so much.

    I recently began dating again after a 15 year hiatus since I graduated high school. I’ve been on dates (Match, eHarmony, etc.), but I always had the same thought in the back of my head – she’s never gonna accept what I have under here. So I end up sabotaging the date somehow. All my friends tell me how great and funny I am. It’s almost easier telling them I’m gay, but in NYC I’d probably be set up with even more dates than with girls. 🙂

    I’m on a disabled dating site now and I feel so much more comfortable. I can open up immediately about my “issue” and then all I have to worry about is if she will think I’m a big dork or not. Well, thanks for putting yourself out there. I hope you find what you’re looking for.

  5. Holly May 19, 2009 at 1:04 pm #

    What a jerk. Well , that was the chance you took when you went live. I am sure that reaching out to more people, and the good responses, will reward your bravery and outweigh the small amt of hurtful negativity such as that ‘sweet talker”.

    I enjoyed your article. My son was born with some external defects as well. Very similar. He was first dx’d with hemihypertrophy (which carries a risk of tumors) , but was later switched to a different dx. By and large, his challenges will be similar to yours. I will be following your blog with interest and also getting your book, hoping to gain some insights how to help him recognize his inner beauty.

    it is interesting…not that we get to choose anyway..but there is that extra challenge that goes along with being “almost-normal”….one wouldn’t have that at all if they were simply missing a limb, and regular all over everywhere else, or whatever. it’d be simple then. I am not a professional writer..just rambling really…but I know you know what I mean.

    You are probably helping more people than you know, by sharing your story.

  6. grant bond May 19, 2009 at 1:04 pm #

    i read this on aol today. there are guys that wouldn’t care about any of that.

  7. Lesley Jane May 19, 2009 at 1:23 pm #

    Hi Carla. Lesley Jane here. Just writing to give you a “thumbs up”.
    Being a bit different myself, I applaud the epiphany of realizing,
    “okay, I’m gonna start out loving myself here, different or not”.

    Here’s a way to look at it you may not have thought of yet.

    I’m unique. True, in this world, that doesn’t always count as much
    as we’d like it to. However. That does not mean that we cannot
    seek out to embrace and celebrate that which is unique about us.
    Take me for example. Once I thought of myself as a bit odd.

    Gosh it’s a real long story (who knows if there’s a character limit, I mean, you could already have your day’s quota of characters on this thing), but short and sweet:

    I’m an American Superheroine,
    specifically, I am American Lesley Jane..

    http://www.soundclick.com/Lesley

    and I also channel John Lennon & George Harrison,
    in the world-famous band BEATLESEX

    http://www.soundclick.com/Lennon

    Yes we’re legit, Lennon’s boyhood pal’s even recorded with us.

    So, like, gee. Wanna see Different?
    When you stop, take in all of this, you go,
    “Man, it really could be worse. I could be Lesley Jane”.

    Beauty, Really IS In The Eye Of The Beholder.
    I think you’re beautiful.

    My name is American Lesley Jane. I’m a professional celebrity;
    don’t try this at home, Kids. Love who you are.
    I love who I are, and I are someone, and that works for me.
    And screw what anybody else thinks.

    Carla, Seriously. You really are beautiful.
    I hope you have that one in the pocket by now.
    It’s not you. It’s them. They really are fucking mutants.
    I know. You hoped it was only paranoia. You’re the normal one
    Dear, I don’t know how to break that to you.

    For we all are unique. You just see it on some sooner than
    on others, is all.

    Some might say, I’m pretty ugly for a Goddess.
    Well poo-poo on them. I don’t think so. I think I’m awesome.
    I think you’re awesome too. I hope this post makes you happy.
    xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox ~L

    Oh our music’s free, and there’s a ton of it,
    and it’s quite good really, please enjoy some!

    I left the addresses up there in this post. See you Sweetie! x

  8. Lesley Jane May 19, 2009 at 1:28 pm #

    Oh gee. PS… did I mention, no I didn’t.
    Well yeah, being a guy AND an American Superheroine,
    that’s sorta different. I’m an normal-sort-of kind of guy,
    except my superpower is I’m a Superheroine. Doesn’t make
    sense to anyone else either Darling, Don’t Worry! xoxox ~L

  9. kidish May 19, 2009 at 2:57 pm #

    It’s a good article. One I relate to, having K-T Syndrome as well. Although admittedly, I cannot relate to knowing who designed my clothes. But how can anyone who has not lived with this all their lives understand? Thank you for writing that article, because yes, coming out and being forthwith like that…well, it’s all we gots.

  10. FlGal May 19, 2009 at 3:51 pm #

    Great article, definitely makes you realize that everyone has their own unique issues about life and dating. I think it’s great you are so strong and have made peace with dating and yourself.

  11. kidish May 19, 2009 at 4:21 pm #

    Greeeat. Now my significant other is on there calling the jerks names.

  12. Michael May 19, 2009 at 6:33 pm #

    Our culture is so obsessed with physical perfection. It’s so absurd. To have life be a satisfying experience it must be explored and appreciated below the surface. I taught 7-8th graders for several years. One assignment I gave was to examine all the popular fashion magazines which I brought in, with the goal of finding one person in the magazine that they would consider average looking, in other words, ” people that look like you and I”. After sometime, I asked if anyone had found an average looking individual in the magazines. Not one hand was raised. We are trained from an early age to be dissatisfied with our looks. The entire beauty industry survives on discontentment. If I loved and accepted the way I looked I wouldn’t need that miracle product that has the power, for a mere $120 a bottle, to turn anyone into a physical specimen that the opposite sex can’t keep their hands off.

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