Such a Pretty Face

I am my own grandpa.

carlasosenko — Tue, 29 May 2012 20:37:20 +0000

I hope all these guys in my phone with the last name OkCupid aren’t related. It’ll be super awk when they find out I’m dating all of them.

Gold digger.

carlasosenko — Tue, 29 May 2012 20:32:37 +0000

“Has that old guy finally left you alone?” Or, why it’s sometimes actually funny to talk about my dating life with my mom.

Did I stutter?

carlasosenko — Tue, 29 May 2012 20:30:59 +0000

Presented without commentary, a recent grocery list.

Stigmatatized.

carlasosenko — Mon, 28 May 2012 22:44:18 +0000

I fear that the unfortunate placement of two blemishes on opposite ends of my forehead are not going to help dismantle the whole Jews-have-horns thing.

Kismet.

carlasosenko — Mon, 28 May 2012 22:40:28 +0000

Is there a Foursquare badge for seeing three different boys you’ve made out with in one location at different times?

Paging Capt. Obvious

carlasosenko — Sun, 27 May 2012 16:53:54 +0000

I encourage all of you to enlist a friend to help you identify some of your dating downfalls. For example, tonight Prana taught me that I should a) not yell at boys and b) not tell them that they are weird when they kiss me. Very helpful!

Always, with wings.

carlasosenko — Sun, 27 May 2012 16:51:30 +0000

A lovely United flight attendant gave my friend and me, both nervous Nelly fliers, wings! Amazing what that (along with a Xanax) does to calm the nerves.

Nicki is an N-word, but not that one.

carlasosenko — Thu, 24 May 2012 19:07:40 +0000

Hey, guys! Please check out my latest piece, on the egregious bleeping of Nicki Minaj’s “Starships,” in Heeb magazine. Thanks for reading!

The Hairpin!

carlasosenko — Tue, 22 May 2012 21:33:00 +0000

Hi, guys! I’m coming to you live from St. Bart’s, where an incredible vacation got even better today, with my essay “Absolute Transparency, or Love in the Time of Google,” being published on The Hairpin, a super-cool site I could gush about all day. I’d love it if you’d mosey on over there to check it out–and poke around the site while you’re there. You won’t be disappointed!

xo c.

Annnnnd…scene!

carlasosenko — Mon, 21 May 2012 13:18:28 +0000

Thursday night was Community‘s epic three-episode season finale—and I recapped it in all my cracked-out, exhausted, had-t0-be-up-at-3:30-for-a-flight glory. It was really fun! Check out the result on Laughspin.com, won’t you?

And see you in the fall, Human Beings!

xo c.